“She’s such a nice girl…

February 7, 2009 § 5 Comments

She needs a boyfriend.”

I have a friend who’s constantly saying this to me anytime one of our single female friends leaves the room. It’s always bothered me that apparently the appropriate reaction to his comment is to nod because GASP, SHE’S A SINGLE GIRL. HOW TRAGIC. Anyway, only yesterday did I finally give him a response: “Not every girl needs a boyfriend. Lots of girls are okay with not having one.”

He, however, chose to ignore this and continue on with the conversation we had been in the middle of.  I wanted to force the issue, but I was tired and didn’t really want to get into a conflict. Lame, I know. I’ll stick it to him next time.

But what really irks me about this whole thing is how completely condescending it sounds (and IS!). He never says, “She’s so bad ass,” or, “She’s so smart.” It’s always, “She’s so sweet,” or, “She’s so pretty.” As if only the cute, sweet ones deserve men. It also makes the assumption that every girl we know is straight. A “sweet girl” never needs a woman. And while I’m sure he thinks he’s giving them a compliment (since he only wants what’s best for them), what I really believe it translates to is:

“Wow, she’s such a great girl, but something’s missing. Let’s get her a guy! Then she’ll be complete!”

Because, duh!!! Without a guy, she’s not a full person!!!


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